Doctor’s visit last night was ok. I go again in two weeks, and after that it will most likely be weekly. My appointment was at 4:15, and I didn’t get called back till almost 4:45. Weight was the same as last time, blood pressure was good. Doc measured my tummy at 31 cm, which is technically a cm shy of where it should be, but it’s not the most accurate measure, and it’s a give or take a cm or two kinda situation anyway.
I still don’t really like the doctor. I don’t hate him or anything. I’m just leery of the whole process I think. Well, and I don’t want an IV.
Yesterday (my telecommute day, wootness), I attempted to watch another episode of Birth Day. This one was on pain management/medication for women in labor. I got about 10 minutes into it before I was crying, feeling defeated and frightened. Just the idea of the epidural is enough to completely freak me out. A huge needle shoved in your back. I think if it was a shot, not a continuous thing, I might be better with it. But even then, the idea of not being in control of my limbs, or of my bladder? Ick. I just don’t like it. It scares me.
I know I don’t want IV drugs. They affect the baby, and you can’t have them after you go past a certain point anyway, because the baby will be born too drugged.
So what’s my choices then? Natural. But the natural people all scream and look like they are in horrid pain.
Low pain tolerance, remember?
Not to mention, thanks to that damn Birth Day show, I now feel guilty for not wanting pain meds. A woman on the show got her epidural, and then felt so much better. She turned to her husband and said, “Aren’t you glad I got the epidural?” And he was. Because she wasn’t screaming and being a bitch anymore. She was just happy and pain free. Its not that I worry about feeling guilty about me, but I feel guilty because I don’t want to put Bobby through any extra stress, I don’t want to make him worry or scare him, and I know he doesn’t want to see me in pain.
Oh yeah, and Landon was actually moving about enough to keep me up last night. Poor child got the hiccups right after I got comfortable, and kept me up for about an hour. First time thats happened!
I had the weirdest dreams last night.
The first one is pregnancy related and stressed me out. I was at thepiskie’s house, I have no idea why. We (meaning us and our SOs) were having dinner together, and talking about my baby. Except Landon was a girl, and we were calling the baby Tobin.
I was mentioning how the baby was getting high up and pushing on my ribs and making it harder to breathe, when suddenly it felt (and in the dream, I felt this) like the baby was standing on the bottom of my uterus, and straightening her legs to stand upright. She was stretching and her head came forward, IN FRONT of my ribs. I couldn’t breathe at all while she was doing this. I ran to the bathroom and pulled up my shirt, and I could see her head, just below my breasts. She was still in my skin, but it was stretched around her so that I could see all her features, and her eyes were black (don’t ask how I knew what color her eyes were). The reminded me of a vampire or werewolf type effect, when they put the whole black contact on the actor. I was totally freaked out, and it hurt where her head was, stuck in front of the bones like that.
I couldn’t breathe, and I passed out. Oddly enough, when I passed out, I woke up.
After I felt back asleep I had a dream that I was working with Dean and Sam (from Supernatural, see icon) and we were getting a hotel room with a king bed. Except I was their sister, so it was icky that we were all sharing a bed. There was a whole plot with a demon and stuff, but mostly I woke up very annoyed that I had dream where I was in bed with Jensen (the actor who plays Dean) and I thought it was icky.

Onward to house issues, the drywall won’t be done being taped and textured till next week, so Bobby can’t actually build the shower or do the tile this week, like he planned. The stucco will be done after that, and it will take a week to cure, and then it can be painted. So that puts us three weeks out. Once the painting is done, then the carpets and such can be put in. So I’m guessing more like 7 weeks. I’m due in 8.
My MIL told Bobby that Landon is not allowed to come until after the house is finished. I don’t think I have that much control, and I’m having the baby in Leo, come hell or high water, so the house better be done by then!
We’ll see how things are looking towards the end of July, and worst case I’ll go get the bassinet from my MIL’s house, some diapers, clothes, and stuff. Then I’ll pack up my books and stuff, put the books into storage somewhere, and put the baby where my book pile is.
My understanding (and please correct me if I am wrong) is that really all I need for the first month or two of baby’s life is my boobies, diapers, clothes, and a place for baby to sleep.
I just want to say that I’m sick of all this stress. I’m sick of stressing about work (what with the whole not enough head count for the work, and possible layoffs), sick of stressing about the house, sick of stressing about my mom, sick of stressing about Bobby’s job/income thing, and most of all, sick stressing about labor. I just want the next eight weeks to be over with.


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